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How To Support Your Child Struggling With Friendships
Do you ever worry about your child making friends at school?
That they may be sitting by themselves at lunch time?
or they have ‘friends’ who play with them one day then exclude them the next day?
If this is something that concerns you – Well, you are in the right place!!!
Because – Today I am sharing with you 3 really powerful tips that will help YOU support your child struggling with friendships – and give you techniques you can implement straight away for immediate results.
Click the video.
When it comes to your child’s Friendship issues it is such a big topic, – it’s loaded with so many emotions that trigger not only your child but YOU as a parent.
It’s something that really pulls at your heart strings – I know, you can literally feel your child’s pain and sadness when they are struggling to make authentic friendships.
I know this because I have been there myself with my son.
I hear so often from Parents that their child is either struggling with:
- Being excluded from playing a game and told to go away
- Or a particular child is friendly one day and excluding them the next day
- Or ‘Friends’ who are not supportive and enjoy ‘putting your child down’.
This can become a real emotional struggle for you as a parent because if you are feeling an emotional reaction to what is going on for your child, you generally have unresolved issues from what happened for you when you were at school.
You start to associate what your child is going through with what YOU went through at school with friendships.
TIP Number 1 – STOP THE WORRY AND STRESS
Please don’t get caught up in the worry about your child when they are at school – honestly, this it is not supporting them.
I will give you an example: Tell me, how do you feel when you hear these words
“I hope she is making friends”
“I hope she isn’t sitting by herself at lunch break”
“I hope she isn’t getting picked on”
Now, tap into your own body when you hear these statements – How does your body feel?
Do you feel in control? Do you feel powerful ?
OR
Do you feel powerless?
Okay – so This is the energy you are communicating to your child when you worry about them
Your child will feel this energy and feel that-
Mum doesn’t think I can make friends either and think -What is wrong with me?
We have this perception that if we show worry or concern for our child – we are a good parent!
So, – No, don’t do that!!!
Worrying about your child is like asking for what we don’t want!
I want you to make the switch now with your mind chatter!
Right now CHOOSE what you DO WANT for your child.
That is how you support your child
Say after me:
“I am so grateful; Sally has attracted wonderful respectful friends to play with”
Feel that energy!!
It’s expansive isn’t it? It feels good right? It feels supportive.
Okay, so now we have your mindset on board – let’s look at your child.
TIP NUMBER 2 – What is a good friend anyway?
Now, this is where you want to spend some time with your child and have a chat to them about what QUALITES that make up a good friend.
You want to allow them to try and come up with their own answers
While you guide them by asking the right questions.
This is INCREDIBLY POWERFUL!!!!
Your child will now start to focus on the Positive qualities of a friend
-Someone who is respectful, kind, funny, supportive, caring, generous, fun to be around, like-minded……………..you get the idea.
this starts that momentum towards attracting who they want as a friend into their life.
THEN
You want them to FEEL the high vibe emotions of actually having this person step into their life.
Fun, joy, happiness, love, appreciation, gratitude………
Feeling these emotions is like a magnet that is going to draw this awesome friend into their life.
Remember to validate to your child that these awesome qualities they can see in their friends are the exact qualities that reside in them.
This will also help to build their own confidence and self-worth.
TIP NO. 3 POSITIVE EXPECTATION
This is a done deal!
We now want to keep this momentum flowing – so we must believe and TRUST that it will happen.
So in order to do this I want you to get one of those cue cards – and write on it in the PRESENT tense all the qualities of this awesome wonderful friend.
Have your child say this before bed each night and every morning before school.
But remember – don’t just say the words…….really FEEL into the emotions of already having these friends in your life now – and how happy it would make you feel.
I did this exact process with my son who was the victim of bullying and moved primary school interstate 3 times.
IT worked every time!!
Right now he has started at a new secondary school in year 7 and the friendships he has made in just one term are incredible. These kids are respectful, funny like-minded children who actually do the same sport as him.
I receive emails from clients all the time telling me it’s a miracle.
It really works and it will work for you!
So you have now learnt that worry does not support your child and instead focusing on what you would like to happen for your child is key.
Tip 2 was to have your child focus on the positive qualities what a true friend is and write those qualities down in the present tense
Tip 3 Is believe and trust that these friends are on their way
Now – if you want click on the link below to download YOUR FREE copy of 7 secrets to raising happy confident self-assured children”
This book is full of MORE great tips you can use with your child to help navigate through the challenging times of parenting.
Its FREE so go ahead and do that now.
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So, what qualities do you see are important in a friend?? Leave a comment below